6.10.09

contentment...


just wanted to write a few words about some of the breakthroughs i have been experiencing lately. thank you to everyone who has said prayers, encouraged, and guided me thus far. thank you to my eternal Pai, who sent his Son and his Spirit to enlighten the darkened areas of my heart.

-growth happens in community. and sometimes our community options don't seem quite like those we may have chosen for ourselves, but goodness can we be surprised. i love the community the Father has placed me in here; it only took me 12 months to realize i was already IN one.

-sometimes we can't control the way we feel...but by seeking help outside ourselves, we can find the ever-elusive contentment amidst difficulty.

-i've been realizing how my yielding to His authority allows Him to be God and me to be human. it's the same with grace. when i stop being my own judge, He is able to judge me with grace and the great depth of His mercy.

-some measure of dependency on others is healthy, and IDEAL. yeah yeah, i know, it's just not american. haha. what if i were to propose that rigid independence is contrary to God's desires for us? i came from a family that champions independence...turns out it's really tiring to strive for it, and more fulfilling to humbly allow others to assist in time of need.

-it's not about what i DO here. honestly, my daily life doesn't measure up to western expectations. i'm ok with that. i'm just trying to be a believer, living among them. my interest is what HE is doing.

-sometimes distance is too hard for people. and that's ok. and i bet those friendships will be just fine. and i am increasingly thankful for those who faithfully reach out to me during my time here.

alright, i just wrote a lot more than i intended to. but it feels good.

(the image above is from this summer also. this girl is the sister of the girl below. i love her youth in the photo.)